Thursday, May 28, 2009

conquering the peak.

several years ago, a group of us drove out to colorado after reading 'wild at heart'. our goal was straight forward and simple: be a man and climb a mountain. one thing he hadn't realized, though. we were, in fact, already men. men that were from iowa. real men that ate corn and beef. real men that couldn't deal with breathing at 10,000 feet. the climb failed. we felt defeated.
that is until we drove out to the rocky mountain national forest for a couple days. camping on the edge of a cliff. cooking breakfast, lunch, and dinner over an open fire. watching the sunset from a cliff with the whole group overlooking a valley of dense trees and then rising up to snow-topped peaks. watching the sunrise from the same cliff alone the following morning and getting the opportunity to thank God for that moment (the silence that filled that valley is something i'll never forget). having to wait for rain so we would have drinking water. no deodorant. beards. man.
this was the best trip i've ever been on. six guys with same goal. even though this goal did not ultimately succeed, we all had the same purpose. it was an awesome feeling to be with five other guys that just wanted to be there. wanted to try something together that we had never done before. the journey was amazing.
now, a few years have past. i just got the e-mail today that long's peak will be the target once again. we know the journey now. hopefully, this time there is a destination.
august 15. 14,000 feet. man. i love it.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

it's like raaaaa-eee-aaaiiin on your...

i was considering writing about my biggest pet peeves. this idea flooded my head while i passed the john walking down the hall at work today. no, i don't have a super arrogant friend named john that has requested we address him as 'the john' to enhance an otherwise fairly common name (sorry to all john's, i mean no disrespect) or maybe just to get a date.....hmmmm...the kevin? my pet peeve idea originated from seeing the toilet paper roll hanging so that you have to pull it from underneath the roll. why would you do that?? seriously. it's so hard to tear along the perforated (i spell checked that) edges when the teary (did not spell check that) part is behind the roll and not visible. there are only two possible outcomes. you rip the paper to shreds trying to actually tear it along the perforated (i remembered from last time) edge or you have to essentially waste a square to get a clear view of the perfed (if i have to use a word 3+ times i'll just abbrev it) edge and the next clown that uses the toilet has to just take that spare piece off and throw it away because who knew where that exposed square has been. oh sure, you can be gross and just roll it back up for the next unsuspecting john visitor.
when i got home, i checked msn and realized i had stumbled across the news story of the year. last year it was the two guys dressed as jedi's fighting in their yard when a man dressed like drunk darth vader (he had consumed an entire box of wine) attacked them. the attacker did NOT know the victims. so, this years story reminded me of another pet peeve that deserved my immediate attention rather than the ta(il)le of the toilet role. plus, i also love a sweet, sweet case of irony. a man who was recently added to the guinness book of world records for filing the most lawsuits ever has...you guessed it....sued guinness for defamation of character. brilliant. don't you worry about guinness, i'm sure they're pleased to be in such good company. previous lawsuits have included (i wish i could have made this up): the makers of grand theft auto, plato, jimmy hoffa, che guevara...it gets better...the lincoln memorial, the eiffel tower, the 13 tribes of israel, the garden of eden, and my personal favorite, i can't believe it's not butter. Even better?? [from wikipedia] (He) has also attempted to intervene as a plaintiff in the Bernie madoff investment scandal, claiming that he "met bernie madoff on eharmony.com in 2001" and taught madoff identity theft skills. This guy is amazing!!!
well, that's all for today. this story just made my day. well, one more thought to leave you with. irony. what IS irony, alanis? 10,000 spoons when you're looking for knife is in fact irony. rain on wedding day, however....is just crappy.

Monday, May 25, 2009

it has begun.

a long time ago, a wise man once said, "holy crap, go get a new cell phone!!" ya see, the screen on my cell phone elected to end itself a couple days after christmas '08. i've never been a gigantic fan of technology...well....i hate it. i can prove it, but allow me one moment for the set up.
one day i would like to sit on stage with a comedian and just observe the audience while said comedian performs his schtick, so when he tells a joke along the lines of, "i saw this commercial on t.v. that said 'you can water your hard to reach plants with this product.' now, who would make their plants so very hard to reach," i could watch the audience to see how many of them lean over to their significant other and i see words, "that's," "so," and "true" mouthed. well, i was myself the victim of one of these moments while watching this video, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jETv3NURwLc, which proves my hatred for technology because it has caused the lot of us (my generation) to become "feed me now" brats that need everything immediately...scratch that...12 seconds ago.
and hear lies my problem. i need to document my quirky life experiences somewhere and this is admittedly a terrific forum to project such stories. it seems on a weekly basis i have some event or encounter that just simply makes me have to laugh because it's just so bizarre. whether it's driving my car to hy-vee when i see a man walking down the street juggling pins and looking completely depressed (happened three nights ago) or driving to ft. dodge for work one morning when i glance to my left to observe a beautiful rainbow which immediately causes an inner dialogue about how thankful i am for creation and in the midst of my emotional high, a bird impales itself into the right front fender of my car, causing me to jump and swerve all over the road. these stories must be told in mass, so they can be passed down from generation to generation, shared around campfires 100 years from now as teenagers complain they had the thought of a bonfire and it hadn't immediately started before their very eyes.
hope you enjoy.

p.s. no, i have not purchased a new cell phone.