weight, what did you say?

After today, I've now had four people comment to me how much weight I've lost. I really didn't think to much of the first couple comments. Just figured it was because I was wearing black (I hear it looks slimming), I'm constantly striking that model pose (hands on the hips, one leg out in front of the other, turned ever so slightly to the side), OR I actually have been losing weight.
This is an odd thing to me because I don't recall ever losing weight. EVER. I was 145 when I graduated from high school. As of April this year, I was 180. Apparently, I really like burgers.
About two months ago, for financial reasons, I swore off fast food first and then a week later decided to stop eating out all together. Haven't touched it for nearly 3 months now (OK, I broke it twice. Once for Chinese food once for DQ. Both extremely good reasons)! This means I think I've officially become a cook.
I have been making a ton of meals at home, which is actually kind of fun. Food is a pretty sweet thing to experiment with. Lots of fish. LOTS of fish. Probably a sickening amount actually.
Because I have discovered a new found love of the creatures from the depths of the sea, I cut WAY back on red meat...which I still think may be a huge mistake. Reference sentence above: "I really like burgers."
Also, because I feel like I've been eating better, I'm more motivated to work out. I started running about 3 weeks ago and have done so almost every day. I clocked just over two miles a few days ago. And for you dummies that scoff at that, keep quiet. That is a big deal for me. Why don't you throw on your cutesy little short shorts, hook up your iPod to your fancy little bicep band, strap a number on your chest and go finish 276th in a 5k.
(Sorry, everyone. That's the heart of red meat-less man speaking)
So, after hearing "Why have you been losing weight??" for the fourth time, I decided to get an answer for this once and for all.
I jumped on a scale after work and....168. 12 pounds lost in the past 3 months.
12 pounds. 100% accidental. Please don't think I'm rockin' this blog to gloat about losing weight. I understand how difficult it is for some. I'm just shocked that the 12 pound drop is almost completely due to me simply not eating crap.
So, my recommendation is if you are looking at shedding a couple pounds and you hate exercise, step one is to stop eating dumb.
Plus, learning to cook will come in handy down the road, men. Girls dig it. I think. Well, that's what I hear at least. I guess I've only cooked dinner for two girls. The first one was a girlfriend that broke up with me the next day. OK, well the cooking IS getting better. Did you hear that, old GF? I don't know. Maybe call me sometime?
Anyway, if you want to shed some pounds and get in shape the REAL way, do this!!
www.jeffbartontraining.com

yeah, and your looks are kind of pretty...when your face isn't screwing it up.

I just read that this year marks...wait for it....the 25th anniversary of Goonies. WHAT YOU TALKIN' 'BOUT GURL??? That does kind of blow my mind. Twenty five years ago. Cripes.
Anyway, instead of looking back wondering where all the years have gone, I thought we could lighten the mood and take a stroll down memory lane.
I give you my list of the top 25 films from the 80's (I seriously tried 10 at first...impossible).
I actually realized in doing this how far superior 80's films are to any of the two decades since. FAR superior. I'm not real sure what it is. It can't be originality can it? I really can't compare it any of the decades prior to the 80's because I simply haven't seen enough. Maybe we just owe it all to John Hughes? It really weird, though, to think back through a lot of those films. I could probably easily name 25 more that I thought were great.
If I were to compile of list of my top 100 of all time (which is bound to pop up somewhere down the road), I wonder how films made in this particular decade would make the cut. I'm willing to go with close to half. Seriously.
I don't feel like going into much detail about why these made the list and others didn't. I think that's because most of them simply made it for the reason that I absolutely loved them as a kid.
There are so few newer movies that I could watch over and over again. I would say there is probably a good 15-20 of these that I could watch once a year or more and never get sick of.
Sooooooooooooo........here. we. go.
25) The Shining
24) The Terminator
23) Big
22) Adventures in Babysitting
21) Big Trouble in Little China
20) When Harry met Sally
19) Short Circut
18) Hoosiers
17) A Christmas Story
16) Spaceballs
15) Breakfast club
14) The Money Pit
13) Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
12) Princess Bride
11) Spies Like Us
10) Planes, Trains and Automobiles
9) Stand By Me
8) Footloose
7) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
6) Raising Arizona
5) Goonies
4) Indiana Jones (trilogy)
3) Clue
2) Back to the Future
1) Ghostbusters

Yep. ALL 80's. Really. That's how good they were. I was really excited to go back through this list once it was completed and think, wow, how awesome is it going to be to go sit with my kids while they watch all these for the first time....maybe we'll wait awhile on 'The Shining.' I don't want to wake up in the middle of the night with little Timmy standing at the foot of my bed pretending to talk with his finger saying, "Redrum. REDRUM!"
I will, however, be thrilled when helping him with his math assignment and out of nowhere he yells, "One point twenty one gigawatts!?"
By the way, the choice of Ghostbusters or Back to the Future was decided by coin toss.

the expedition for cloud nine.

I believe a constant struggle of many men and women my age is depression. It may not be that classical form of depression, not wanting to leave the house/emotionally strained, but fits the bill none the less. It is an obsession to create happiness on our own using external influences...whether it comes from movies, sports, friendships, relationships, etc. There is nothing wrong with having these things that make you happy, but these are all temporary fixes to a chronic problem. Even in a relationship, these feelings are bound to intermittently hide or disappear altogether.
I believe this is something I've struggled with for some time now. I am searching for something outside of myself to make me happy, because if I don't feel happy, the solution is out there somewhere, right? Negative.
I accepted Christ when I was in seventh grade. That acceptance allowed the Holy Spirit to my heart, to live IN me. This happiness I'm searching externally for is planted within my very soul begging to be allowed to provide me with all the satisfaction, gratitude, happiness I can never attain from anything this world could ever offer.
So, why my age group? Why is culture crashing down this reckless path of depression/this impossible search for satisfaction?
In rereading 'The Lost Virtue of Happiness,' I found a terrific example of one area, specifically men, struggle with constantly. Women. In 2001 there was an article published in Psychology Today that with our culture's constant exposure to beautiful people it has made us less interested in dating or in our spouses. We've seen all the "beauty" there is out there making us less content with the true beauty around us. Obviously, this article was specifically about looks, but I think it goes far beyond that every category. We watch movies about the guy or girl that always says the right thing, the hero, the comedian, the romantic. We set that as our standard, which no one in real life can live up to. We search and search which leads to our frustration that we can't find what satisfies us. Once again, it's within us.
The follow up comment in 'The Lost Virtue' regarding the article in Psychology Today is heavily underlined now in my book:

"Why is it we think this way? We are empty selves, drunk with seeking happiness and, as a result, individualistic, narcissistic, infantile people who approach others as objects that exist merely to make us happy. Slowly but surely, the contemporary notion of happiness is killing our relationships, our religious fervor, our very lives."

And, folks, there is your verbal equivalent to a punch in the face. It was for me at least. What a wake up call to be referred to as a self-centered, arrogant child.
For those of you that go to Cornerstone, you may remember Paul preaching about feelings, referring to them as liars. This book takes a similar approach:

"The current understanding of happiness identifies it as a pleasurable feeling. Pleasant feelings are surely better than unpleasant ones, but the problem today is that people are obsessively concerned with feeling happiness; people are slaves to their feelings. Feelings are wonderful servants but terrible masters."

We need to stop this worldwide search for what will make us happy in this moment and search within ourselves for Spirit of living God that will satisfy forever.

"Advancing the kingdom of God, living in intimacy with God and others, and honoring God by reflecting His good nature are the goals of life."
"It is to become like Jesus himself and have a character that manifests the radical nature of the kingdom of God and the fruit of the Spirit. It is to find out God's purposes for your life and to fulfill those purposes in a Christ-honoring way."

Yeah, it's a pretty good book.
This is really a journal entry to myself on the fixes I need to make in my own heart, but I know numerous friends that are fighting through these feelings of grief and depression. Those on a search for something/someone to make them happy, to satisfy, to fill them.
There is happiness to be had. His name is Jesus.